Guerra Talks Gilmore: Rory Got Hit By A Deer & So Did I
For the record, I tried to move out of its way...
We are officially five episodes into season one, and I’m about five seconds away from ordering this Chilton Prep sweatshirt because it wasn’t just the Lorelais’ first day at the prestigious private school - I was there, too! Though, interestingly enough, Paris Geller didn’t go snooping through my student records… it’s because I got a few C’s in math, isn’t it?
All joking aside, I am thrilled to be back at Chilton with some of my favorite - and, in my opinion, some of the show’s best - side characters.
First, we have Paris.
I adore Paris. She’s one of the best mean girls to grace our television screens. She’s quick-witted, snarky, and highly intelligent, but also super vulnerable. She may have a rough exterior, but underneath all the blonde hair and behind that lipstick-less snarl, Paris just wants what any high schooler wants. Approval.
Specifically, her parents’ approval, and for her crush to like her back.
Becoming high school valedictorian, editor in chief of the school paper, The Franklin, and getting into Harvard aren’t just aspirations, they’re accomplishments she hopes will make her parents proud enough to pay a sliver of attention to her. I appreciate that we know what Paris’s problem is right from the start. We don’t have to guess why she’s the mean girl; school is what she’s best at - what she excels at - and she doesn’t want that taken away from her.
And listen, I don’t condone bullying IRL, but the way Paris picks on Rory makes for excellent television. Her ears are always perked and listening, her ginormous brain is constantly collecting information she could use to dig a little deeper under Rory’s skin. She’s not tripping Rory in the hallway or smacking her lunch tray out of her hands. She’s just… talking.
Then there’s Tristan Dugray.
Played by the one and only Chad Michael Murray. I won’t get too ahead of myself or talk about things that take place later on in the season (we’ll get to those later). At this point in my rewatch, Tristan is annoying as heck. He obviously has a crush on Rory and is trying to use kindergarten psychology to get her to like him back. He gives her a nickname (“Mary”), and he teases her. I’m half waiting for the day he leans over his desk to yank her pigtails. But he’s nice to look at, so, he can stay.
Madeline and Louise are also present.
These young women are interesting because they aren’t your typical mean girls, and I wouldn’t go as far as to say they’re Paris’s cronies. Louise is presented as a stereotypical boy-crazy blonde, but she’s certainly not dumb. Chilton isn’t a school for the intellectually challenged, and even though Madeline is presented as the airhead of the group, it’s a subjective comparison. But not only are these two smart, but they also think independently of Paris. When they feel she’s been wronged by Rory, they do come to her defense, but there are plenty of times Paris is icing Rory out, but they still warm to her, especially Madeline.
And Max, Medina. Maaaaax Medina.
Max gives a lot of people the ick. I am not one of them.
Do I think he and Lorelai move too quickly? Yes. Do I think they barely know each other before he declares there’s an attraction and they should date? Also yes. Am I a sucker for forbidden romance and the handsome English teacher trope? 1000%.
I’m just saying, he has dark features, is highly literate, and wants to share his love of books with Lorelai. Sound familiar? There’s a reason I’m team Jess. I’m consistent.
HOWEVER, I have many criticisms. So, stay tuned for those when we cross those bridges.
While we’re on the subject of Max, I wanted to discuss the episode in which we meet the studious stud: Season One, episode four, titled The Deer Hunters.
There are so many things I love about this episode. It gets me invested in the show. Don’t get me wrong, The Pilot is fantastic, but it’s very clear in The Lorelai’s First Day At Chilton and Kill Me Now that the writers are still finding their footing. That’s not to say they have it all figured out by episode four. Not by a long shot. But everything is starting to flow better; we’ve been introduced to pretty much everyone that is going to be important for the foreseeable future; Emily loses the stuffy haircut and taps into the comedic side of her persona.
Ok, so, to recap: Rory gets her first D on an English paper, and Maaaax Medina tells her to study for the test on Friday, which will make up 20% of her grade. Rory doesn’t tell Lorelai about her bad grade, but she finds out when she attends a parent-teacher meeting and meets bachelor number one. Lorelai dips out of the parent-teacher meeting early (probably for the best, as she was about to verbally throw down with the snooty PTA), collects Rory from Luke’s, and they pull an all-nighter studying Shakespeare.
Welp, the Gilmore girls fall asleep without setting an alarm, causing Rory to wake up late and in a panic. She’s missed the bus, so Lorelai gives her the keys to the Jeep, and off she runs.
What I don’t understand about this next series of events, is Rory stops at a stop sign in the middle of a forest (????) and calls Lane to ask if she left her notes at her house. First of all, the route to Lane’s house from Rory’s house is not a thicket of trees. Second of all, why does it matter if she left her notes at Lane’s house? She’s already late. There’s no turning around! She has to get to Hartford, which requires a highway commute, and I imagine traffic, given Rory is on the road at 7:40 am, and that is rush hour. But I digress. The phone call was a plot device so that Rory would be a sitting duck in the woods (again, ????) and a deer would ram into the side of her car, causing her to waste even more commute time to get out of her vehicle and search for the wounded buck.
Long story short, Rory doesn’t make it in time to take her test. She has a meltdown, yells at Paris and Tristan, and is escorted out of the classroom. The headmaster calls Lorelai, they have words, but Max makes it all better by striking up a deal with the headmaster, scoring Rory some extra credit projects. He also flirts with Lorelai through the answering machine. Cue my husband rolling his eyes and me smiling as though Max was flirting with me.
What peeves me about this episode is the fact that no one believes Rory when she says her car got hit by a deer. I know Rory’s frustration in this, because my car was also hit by a deer, and I have the scar to prove it. Not to mention the trauma.
My experience was a little different than Rory’s, though.
I was driving on Route 287, and if you’re familiar with Route 287 in New Jersey, you know the highway is pitch black at midnight. There are no streetlights. There are no rest stops. It’s just road for miles.
Anyway, in my peripheral vision, I see something moving, and suddenly there’s a huge deer, a buck, a few feet ahead of me. I didn’t have time to switch lanes, so I swerved, and rather than keep going straight, the damn deer swerved with me and ran, head first, into my car.
That’s right, a buck headbutted my Buick.
I closed my eyes as I slammed on the brakes. I heard the skidding of tires and the shattering of glass. Shards darted all over the interior and sliced up my legs. The worst part was, something heavy and large landed in my lap. For a second, I swore there was going to be a deer head crushing my thighs when I opened my eyes.
Nope.
It was my passenger mirror. The deer was nowhere to be found. I sobbed all the way home. I called Mark, I called my parents. When I got home, there was blood all over my legs and deer hair stuck in different cracks around my car. I came out of the experience shaken and with a little round scar on my upper left thigh.
So, no, Max. No, Lorelai.
NO, LANE!
Rory didn’t hit a deer.
Rory’s car was hit by a deer.
It happens, okay?
Glad we cleared that up.
This is a Jersey girl issue for sure. I was driving in Chester on 24 and a deer jumped off of a hill and landed on top of my car. Hopped off and ran back into the woods. Not a scratch on my car. Just random and startling. Your experience sounds so scary. 😞
OMG Julia!! As a Hunterdon County girl growing up, my greatest fear was/is hitting or getting hit by a deer -especially on highways like 287 and 78! It happened to SO many of my friends. Glad you were ok despite the PTSD I'm sure that came with it!